Tuesday, March 3, 2015

And yet again.... sitting with death

Yesterday I visited my Uncle George and Aunt Joan.  Death is settling into their household.   This one promises to be a happy death.  Uncle George is well past 80 years old.  Although he has been bent over with severe osteoporosis and stenosis for the last few years, it was only recently that his zest for life, food, and especially good wine began to wane.

He has stopped eating.  He no longer ventures from hospital bed to chair.  His hospice caregivers (whom he calls his angels) are helping his body and mind to be comfortable.

Once again, I am witnessing the expansion of peace and joy within a faithfilled person as he dies. He is ready.

Over the years I have envisioned death in many ways:   a river, a valley, a chasm, "over the rainbow", or as a doorway, or threshold.  Having seen it repeatedly lately, another image comes to mind:  a veil.
The veil provides separation between life and death, yet as one sits with dying, there are glimpses of the beyond that appear.  Not literally, of course!  Yet as we sit vigil with dying the threads of prayer, scripture, and stillness become interwoven with the breathing of the one who is moving from life to death to eternal life.

Then the final exhalation is expressed... and the veil "poofs" aside.  There you go, dear one!

One more thing about death and life that relates to breath.  John O'Donohue wrote all breaths come in pairs, except the first and the last. We inhale, we exhale, with (generally) little thought about the process.  The pairing for the first breath (big inhalation by the newborn) is the exhalation as one dies. The veil moves aside, and the cycle of mortality ends.

The experience of death and dying has similarities we all share.  Yet for each person and family it is unique.  One thing is true for all:  it does not have the final say!

No comments: