Fear.................not

Matthew 10:26-31

'So do not be afraid of them. Everything now covered up will be uncovered, and everything now hidden will be made clear. What I say to you in the dark, tell in the daylight; what you hear in whispers, proclaim from the housetops. 'Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul; fear him rather who can destroy both body and soul in hell. Can you not buy two sparrows for a penny? And yet not one falls to the ground without your Father knowing. Why, every hair on your head has been counted. So there is no need to be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.


I am reminded that Jesus said again, and again, and again...."Do not be afraid". Logic tells me that those words were spoken because, indeed, there are forces and powers that might instill fear. There are "those" who can threaten the vigor and vitality of the soul. Sometimes we are tormented by fear and don't really recognize the power of what is happening until we stumble...or hit some sort of wall.

Why, just last week I spent a couple of days wrestling with unnamed tormentors. It wasn't anything huge or blatant. It was nothing more than an abiding sense of restlessness and unease. It was a covert, subversive process that persistantly eroded my vision of peace, beauty and joy.

Foolishly, I wrote it off as nothing more than stress... it grew.... and it erupted in words that were impatient, curt, judgemental. Even my countenance was dark as I slumped through the world. I was confronting each and every annoyance toe to toe...and the more I wrestled, the more tightly my heart and spirit were bound. It was as if a vice was clamping gradually, relentlessly, to squelch my vision of freedom and possibility.

I give thanks that something "clicked" ... I got sick and tired of cowering in the fear and stagnation of my "stuff". My view of life and even of myself was distorted. I finally, simply STOPPED...

or maybe it wasn't me...perhaps ...no, certainly...

the One who cares even for the sparrow was reaching out. I was stopped by the light and love of God.

It was reaching out to me in ways both grand and minute -- the sight of the fawn resting in my front yard, the compassionate gaze of a friend when she noticed that my voice was shaky and that tears were close to the surface of my eyes,

Then, in the liturgy...the words of forgiveness and reconciliation..."peace be with you....".

I felt the depth and breadth of God's presence. Gentle breezes of spiritual renewal began to refresh my thoughts and my emotions.

Forgive me gracious one....how could I have forgotten, even for a moment, that you are with me in the midst of every force that threatens the soul's contentment, peace and wholeness. Those days were a reminder of the how easily I can be distracted...and how beautiful and serene time and space truly are in your presence.

Nothing, absolutely nothing, can eclipse the light of your love.

Thank you.....