Being There

I'm preparing for a Wilderness Camping trip. The process is drastically different from preparing for a trip to a civilized place.

Everything I'm taking can be compacted to fit in a backpack. I am taking nothing stylish or that could be seen as an embellishment to my image. It is all about gathering together tools or equipment that will allow me to safely (and, I hope, even pleasantly) experience whatever nature provides. In other words, every day will offer simply what it has, and my participation in the day will require the ability to accept what is there.

Although I am hoping for crystal clear air and radiant skies, I am fully equipped for rain and storm. My enjoyment of it all will depend upon my attitude -- gratitude, flexibility, surrender.

I've become accustomed to being forewarned about situations...technology and the forecasters are fairly accurate, whether we are seeking foreknowledge about weather, economics, human behavior or even human physiology. Foreknowledge then moves me into believing I can control much of my day...and I can! I can manage who I talk to and when, I can control the degree of lighting in my "space" and I can control the comfort of my immediate environment, including the temperature and humidity. To some extent the ability to manage what is going to unfold in the next 24 hours becomes addictive -- I come close to becoming an information junkie.

I check the weather radio to see what to wear, I step on a scale to judge how the fitness program is going, I look at food labels to see what nutrients I am consuming, I listen to the traffic report to see which route to take, I check the sitemeter to see who is reading this blog, I check voice mail to see who has been trying to communicate with me, I frequently look at a clock to see how much time I have to perform a task...you get the idea!

This behavior may facilitate my function in my OWN estimation, or in the eyes of the people with whom I interact....but it has absolutely NOTHING to do with how God is guiding or sustaining or caring for Pamela. It has nothing to do with drawing me into God's heart ...

A trip into the wilderness is like fasting from the conditions of civilization. I will have the benefit of a modern protective gear(tent and outerwear) and some flashlights, but that is the extent of the civilized comfort I will carry. Once I am at my destination, I will surrender to whatever the day or night brings. I will not wear a watch....I will have no access to forecasts or measuring devices of any kind, other than my own observation and instinct. I will seek to adapt with gratitude, wisdom and the deep contentment that emerges when all expectations and desire to control are set aside.

I will simply be "there."